Born To Shop. Forced Cook. click to enlarge Quantity Price: $24.99 Updating cart... Product Code: AP36 Product Tags: apron, Related Products The kitchen observes the 5 SECOND RULE: If its on the floor for less than 5 seconds, ITS STILL GOOD! Dinner is ready when the smoke alarm goes OFF I’m the Chef. That’s Why! Please keep this person out of the kitchen! Its called DIET because all the other 4-letter words were taken. Dude With Food Kiss The Chef Calories don’t count if you eat standing up.